My Playground
I've though long and hard about whether or not to let people know about what I'm really thinking (the things I write in here). I've finally just decided to indirectly reveal the existance of this journal and considering certain things written in certain places, certain people have caught on to it's existance. I'm still debating on whether or not revealing this journal was a good idea, but I feel a whole lot better about myself knowing that I'm not keeping very much sercet anymore. I don't think I have any other secrets, except what I write in my journal on my computer. I'm definatley not going to reveal the contents of that because of the things I've written in the past. My feelings have long changed since some of the earlier posts in my private journal, but I'm afraid some people may not understand that, which is why I've kept this journal secret and anonymous for so long.
As far as I can tell, only one person knows about this journal, and for now I'd like to keep it that way. Since I knew that either this journal would be discovered or I would reveal it I never wrote some of my feelings down. Considering my insecurity I think that was a good idea.
Reflecting on the contents of the last post, it may seem that sex is a nightmare for me, but I want to clear up that it's not something I'm afraid of or something I don't want, it's just something I'm afraid of screwing up at (no pun intended). I definately want it, and with no one but my girlfriend. Another reason why I've stayed a virgin for so long is because, starting from age 10, I was raised as a Christian and was always told about the no sex before marriage thing and how bad of a sin it was. Now I don't see why that's stopping me because I commit similar sins everyday or so (if you know what I mean). I seriously don't want to wait that long though.
As for the future of this 'blog. I don't know if I'll be updating it for very often, because I previously had that security of not being found out. Now that it's gone I may be less inclined to update here. I'm not planning on shying away from showing my emotions here, but it's not really under my conscious control.
2MC_Boy