My Playground
The past few days have really been crap for me. For almost two weeks I've been in more depression than I've ever before. Everything I do to try to fix it doesn't seem to work and I don't know why. I'm not going to be posting in my Xanga blog for a while to see what people say and because I have nothing to say to anyone I know that I haven't already said. If I continue writting in it I'll just keep ranting and raving about my problems, which I'll probably be doing here too.
Well, I'm going to try to cheer up for a little bit right now and just talk about my day a little. This morning I almost forgot that I was supposed to bring in the shoes for my R.O.T.C. uniform. We are going to be polishing them for the next few days. This morning turned out to be another ackward period between me and my ex-girlfriend. First period was boring as usual, but unlike earlier this morning while I was taking a shower, I couldn't seem to form a poem that expressed my feelings. I don't wanna just BS them as much anymore because I find that I say alot of stuff that just isn't true.
Third period my class went to the library for a few minutes at the end of the period and my friend was telling me all about this guy he liked. He's kind of sad though because his friend said that they shouldn't go out because he was afraid of hurting him, so we'll have to wait and see what's going to happen with them (if you haven't already guessed, my friend is gay).
Fourth period I have R.O.T.C. so I had to go clean my uniform shoes. I was advised not to go in the bathroom though. I was told it was literally covered in crap. For the rest of the period we marched like we often do.
Lunch was another ackward time. I don't think I said more than ten words, if that. This kid that hangs out around us started pissing us off again. I wouldn't be annoyed all that much if he was only annoying me, but since he's bothering my friends and my ex-girlfriend (yes, I admit, I do still like her) he really pisses me off. One of my friends tied him up in his sweater a few times, once even accidentally tightening it a bit too much around his throat and choaking him. He then called my ex-girlfriend by a name she doesn't like and she ran after him. I kind of stayed behind alone and just sat there. The kid ran into the school library where she couldn't reach him, but he'll probably end up paying for it tomorrow (sometimes I wish I wasn't such a pacifist).
Well, I can't say much about fifth period because I didn't go. I showed up and asked my teacher for a pass to the nurse and then walked around for the rest of the period. About half way through I found a friend of mine that had been excused from her fifth period class because she had gone somewhere durning fourth period (same class as me by the way). So we ended up talking for almost the remainder of the period. Mostly talking about relationships and trust, can't have one without the other (she brought the whole thing up, sort of).
Sixth period was boring as usual. Spanish class isn't all that exciting. Seventh period went the same as usual except that we've started extended practices which means we have to stay an hour longer. We just marched the whole time, except for a five to ten minute break in the middle.
After school I was really quiet like the rest of the day and I annoyed my mom because I didn't say anything when she asked what was wrong. She's the last person I want to talk to about it. She's half the reason the whole thing broke apart. All she ever does is try to make me paranoid about everything. Every guy that my ex-girlfriend hung around, my mom would tell me to be careful, she might leave me for him. She even said that about the gay friend from above. She seriously drives me insane. She makes me paranoid about literally everything. I can't tell her anything without a huge arguement coming out of it.
Well, now I'm sitting here doing nothing. Interesting day, huh?! Well, sayonara.
2MC_Boy